Sauce wrapped in cheese

Guy Fieri Squeeze Bottles

Okay, we have officially gone too far as a society. The line has been squirted in the sand: screen-printed squeeze bottles might just be the most unnecessary celebrity chef merchandising concept ever. First of all, who’s gonna see them? You’re in the kitchen, cooking for some guests. Do you turn to a friend and ask them to pass the Guy Fieri Squeeze Bottles? No, no you do not. Please, do not.

You can’t blame Marketing for coming up with such a useless promotional item. After all, precedent has been set. We now live amongst Alton Brown Flags (not really) and Rachael Ray Sheets (really). The madness has to stop. Even if you do need a set of squeeze bottles, there are better options out there. Here, just get these and draw on all the cheesy dice, flame, and/or skull tattoos your heart desires.

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